Your Reaction Matters?
I was getting A ready when we had to go out and A was not coming to me immediately. I waited for quite some time, but, she's been telling she'll be right there after doing this, after doing that etc and I kept waiting. Then she saw something(edible but she doesn't like to eat it) in a plate and put her hand in it. Already having waited for long time, I reacted saying 'That's not something you like to eat, please come here, A'. For which she said, 'one of it fell off the plate and I kept it in the plate, that's all amma'. And I replied, 'Oh, I'm sorry, I couldn't see what you were doing'. She came back to me with a big smile.
Yes, she had a reason for putting her hand in the plate. But from a parent's perspective, we may feel that she is only whiling away her time eventually delaying us. We immediately react with anger/irritation in our tone as a result of which both our's and the child's mood are spoiled. Each of us can imagine what could happen with our own child if we reacted in a negative way.
This scenario only reiterates the following points:
Yelling is never the right way to react.
Take a deep breathe and try to pose questions to your child for which she replies and you understand her better.
Remember, every moment, every situation you are in by your child side, it is an opportunity to develop a stronger connection with your child.
Before shooting up in anger, take a fraction of moment to think from the child's perspective and your anger vanishes.
When there is no yelling in parenting, you will start appreciating your own self, your child and the bond you share better every day.
When there is neither irritation nor anger nor yelling, you transform to a happier self, understand simple scenarios in life from a third eye perspective and lead a happier life.
As the child is only seeing a happy-mommy personality rather than an angry mommy or irritating mommy, the child learns to be happy, learns to deal tough things in life peacefully.