October 23, 2017

Society says, Be tough with your child!

Why am I always on the other side of all the traditional parenting principles? Why do I think for the child in contrast to against the child(well, I do receive suggestions on how to be tough with children)? Why do I understand the pain of being through a tough childhood? Why do I realise the gift of children being surrounded with positive words?

And many more whys.

OK, enough of the whys(reasons for which are known and whose discussion may not be of any use here).

Leave apart the why, let's focus on what else I can learn and how else I can contribute in the journey of another soul on the earth.

The suggestions that I frequently receive:

  • Let your child(infant) cry for a while. This aids in the digestion of all the milk she feeds on. (Oh! Really? If it were for the physical activity, as if she is not being played with and cuddled enough!)
  • Let your child cry for a while before you pick her up or take her for her feed. (Again! Is it?) The child knows better when she is hungry, the child knows better when she is feeling sleepy, the child knows better when she is in a mood to play on her own and even better when she wants to have a companion to play with. It is not the lack of anything when a one year old is asking for your company to play with her. 
  •  Be tough with your child even when she is crying, this will toughen her up to deal with the bad world around. But Why? Why can't someone be able to learn the world with a positive eye? Just because child abuse is rampant in the society, we cannot start child abuse at home as if we are providing the foundation of what the world would be offering later. 
  • Do what you wish, to your child, even if she refuses/denies/cries because she has to become tough and strong to gain her position in society later. No. You do not oppress a child's opinion so that she complies to you now and complies to whatever society tells her in her later life. You encourage your child to voice her opinion, you respect your child's words, you see through your child's perspective so that she continues to raise her voice to make a positive impact in the society all through her life. 
  • You can manipulate your child to whatever you wish to. Again? Why do you always want to mute the child's voice. Your toddler knows best when she says 'enough, ma'  because she is not able to take any more food. Children can sense the unseen. If you always try to manipulate your child to what you wish her to do on the physical level, the child stops becoming aware of all the wonderful things that her mind catches in nature. More than being present merely on physical plane, we are all spiritual beings. Children are more aware of their spiritual knowledge than the adults are. 

If there are rules to be followed, to be part of the society, I am more than happy staying away from it and carve my own path to happiness. 

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