March 09, 2016

Conscious Parenting - Empathy

It is very important to know what you talk and how you react when with children.

Any 2 year old does not have a fully developed brain to think from another person's perspective and act accordingly. Young children do not have the ability to empathise with others. 'Being empathetical' is an ability that children develop gradually as they enter their third or fourth year and most importantly based on their early childhood experiences.

This is when the importance of conscious parenting is realised. To teach a child empathy, you have to empathize with her in her early years, when she was upset with something, when she simply screams because she was not able to open the lid, when she was rolling on the floor, when she wanted the toy that was not practically reachable, when she wanted to play something that was not possible at that moment, when she doesn't want to leave her sand play, when she doesn't want to come out at the end of her bath, when she wants to have some snacks right at her dinner time and many other instances when she wants to do something that is not acceptable by you as a parent.

For example, when she suddenly yells out because she was trying to open a lid and it doesn't open as it got stuck somewhere. Or, she was trying to close a drawer while she hurt her finger and there's a screeching cry. Or, she returns from park, reaches the entrance of your flat and then suddenly rolls on the floor asking to take her back to the park. How do you react? Do you also yell at the child saying, 'why do you want to do all this? Can't you just leave it there? OK, its your wish, I am leaving, you can stay there.' etc. If you had reacted so, remember that the child is learning to react the same way when she encounters similar situations in her life. You are teaching your child to react in that manner.

Being conscious of what you speak and how you react is very important. 

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